One liners

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Topic author
Big Ade
Beiträge: 229
Registriert: Sonntag 25. März 2012, 16:42
Vorname: Ade
Wohnort: Sheffield, South Yorkshire, England
Alter: 69

One liners

Beitrag von Big Ade » Montag 25. Juli 2016, 20:30

I was getting into my car the other day and this bloke says to me. "Can you give me a lift?"
I said "Sure. You look great, the world's your oyster, you are fit and healthy so go for it.."

Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 people in my family, and it's not me so it's either my Mum or my Dad, or my older brother Colin, or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. But I think its Colin.

Two fat blokes are drinking in a pub, one says to the other "Your round." The other one says. "So are you, you fat b*stard!"

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, and the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said, 'Parking Fine. So that was nice wasn't it?



Beiträge: 2269
Registriert: Montag 17. Oktober 2005, 16:39
Vorname: Ralf
Wohnort: Pforzheim
Alter: 61

Re: One liners

Beitrag von Blubber » Dienstag 26. Juli 2016, 07:21

:lol: :lol: OMG, they are worse than the German ones :mrgreen: :mrgreen:
Meine Meinung steht fest - bitte verwirren Sie mich nicht
mit Tatsachen !

Beiträge: 133
Registriert: Mittwoch 6. April 2011, 17:29
Wohnort: Euskirchen
Alter: 40

Re: One liners

Beitrag von Mortalitas » Sonntag 31. Juli 2016, 19:05

actually: they are great :lol:
Alles unter 29 ist Betriebstemperatur!